In Wells Fargo I trust…

So, I have a confession.  I had a mildly scary almost misdemeanor occur this weekend.  So here it is:

Here I was waking up at 8:30am on a Sat morning, doing some dishes, laundry, feeding the animals, bills, etc.  You know, being a good wife and all.  So I was paying some bills with my husbands account.  Yes I am the financially minded one in our household; I guess that’s what you get after getting a finance degree.  Anyways, I was pretty glad realizing this was one of the few months that he happened to have 3 paychecks.  So I decided to transfer a couple hundred to our joint account as a cushion for a rainy day.  (Technically that rainy day will come sooner than later with our mortgage going up based on wonderful taxes, but I won’t bore you with any details).

So I transferred some money and as soon as I clicked out of the transfer funds.  And like a good OCD individual (we’ll expand on this later) I checked the new balance of our joint account to smile at myself for a job well done.  And much to my demise, the balance was not there.  I quickly realized I transferred the money erroneously to my husband’s Visa.  After several unpleasantries passed my lips I decided to call Wells Fargo and do what I could to transfer the money back into a transferrable account.

WF Rep:  Could I have you name please?

Me:  Alan Last Name

WF Rep:  Could I have YOUR name please?

Me:  Alan

WF Rep:  What’s the last four our your SSN?

Me:  1234 (technically I spoke the correct numbers)

WF Rep:  Mother’s Maiden Name, Middle Name, Acct #

I got them all right, and decided to keep on with the game. (I knew I wasn’t on his account, but there was no need up to that point, I had all the access I needed online to do my bills, and it was never required.)

WF Rep:  Please hold…

Me:  Oh, Crap…*under my breath*

I guess at this point I should further explain myself.  My husband works for an identity theft company.  So it was not part of my better judgement to act falsely upon his behalf.

New WF Rep:  Hello, could I have your name?

Me:  *more timid* Alan Last Name

New WF Rep:  Hi Miss Last Name, I am part of the WF Fraud department, and lately we’ve been having a lot of concern when it comes to fraud.

At this point I folded like a lawn chair and admitted my lies.  

Long story short, I called my husband (who was faithfully at work protecting other identities for the day) and left a sobby message on his cell phone.  

Me:  So you’re going to have to go to WF and take the fraud hold off your account.  Bring your id.  I’m, sorry, I love you.  Please have them transfer the money back for me.

Several hours later, my husband comes home from work.  I guess it didn’t help he had his company shirt on, which was well recognized for the identity theft.  He had to tell the story of his wife pretending to be him.  

I can’t help but wonder why my husband didn’t have a gender neutral name.  Yeah, maybe I don’t learn my lessons very well